Now that I’ve changed my shorts…

So I hate traffic reports because they never tell me what’s really going on. Hmm, Route 3 is backed up today so I best listen in. Yup, they say it’s really bad and even after it clears up it’ll get bad again around Route 21. So it seems like I’ll head up to I80 as quickly as possible and take that to work. Yay! I’m driving fast again! For a whole half mile that is. Then it’s a standstill once more. Oh, whoops, we forgot to mention that they’re still clearing a tractor trailer accident on 80 and it’s still backed up from exit 57. Thanks a lot guys, I skipped the clear part of 3 to get to the backup of 80 faster. Now it’s noon and I’ve been at work for half an hour.

The worst part of the whole morning was my attempt to cut through Secaucus. Sure the sign said “No Turn on Red”, but I get sick of waiting at those lights. Besides, no one was really close. Of course as soon as I turn I notice the cop heading in the opposite direction. Oh crap! But no way is he going to turn around just to nab me… Why is he pulling over? Why is he turning around?! Why is he putting his lights on?!?! Well this ought to be just great (especially with my overdue inspection sticker on the car). So I pull over along with a couple cars behind me. He waves the van behind me on and I know it’s because he wants me. Then a funny thing happens – he pulls in behind the car that was behind the van! I pause for a moment to reflect, then gun it to make my getaway (at 25 MPH). I take that as my lucky break and go easy the rest of the ride, which takes me 3 times longer than usual! Gonna be a crappy day…

2 thoughts on “Now that I’ve changed my shorts…”

  1. I still think Seacaucus was designed by Dr. Seuss. To this day i don’t know what side (East or West) of Rt 3 the Home Depot is on, nor how I’m actually supposed to get there. One day I tried and spent a half hour following signs for Rt 3 Est, only to go in a huge circle. That place is pure evil.

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