Rosebud was a sled

I’m still trying to work through possibly the funniest MetaFilter thread ever. Basically they all went nuts trying to list every spoiler they could remember. Some of the highlights include (look away if you’re afraid of anything being ruined):

Jesus gets tacked up. But he gets over it.

The chick has a dick.

NEO AND TRINITY BOTH FUCKING DIE

Of course, the punchline is that Klinger winds up staying in Korea after everyone else leaves, because he likes it there after all.

I know, go figure.

Kelly, Ozone, and Turbo save the community center.

It turns out the Sheriff is Black.

Godot never arrives.

Its all in the reflexes. He idiotically refuses the advance of the totally hot green eyed babe. The demon is still alive on the back of his truck in the driving rain storm.

He destroys the Ministry of Information with the help of the rogue Air Conditioning Repair Man and escapes with the woman of his dreams.

In reality, he’s being tortued by a fellow Ministry of Information employee donning a baby mask.

Slim Whitman’s singing makes the aliens’ heads explode.

Truly, he was the Son of God.

One of the more interesting takes on an ending (and at least a tad obscure):

… but I still can’t believe that he would give the hard won diamond earrings to the passive-aggressive tomboy Watts instead of the sweet perky redhead Amanda.

And of course one of the all time classics:

Senator and Mrs. Blutarsky, Washington, D.C.

If you get all of those references – bully for you!

(thanks to A Whole Lotta Nothing)