The future of television

Are you tired of having to get up and adjust those rabbit ears every time you change channels? Does the constant stream of static give you headaches and induce nausea? Have you ever wondered what’s going on in the world on channels other that FOX? Are you the only kid on the block streaming the Super Bowl over the Internet because it’s on freakin’ CBS?!?! Then have I got the solution for you – it’s called basic cable! Or, in my case, FiOS TV Local.

That’s right, for just a low $12.99 per month, you won’t need to wait for the audience to start cheering before you realize that Kramer has stumbled onto the set during Seinfeld re-runs. No longer will the entire cast of The Simpsons appear as a single yellow blur. And, most importantly, you’ll be able to figure out whether or not the members of Lost have actually stopped shaving.

That’s right, I’ve given up on my free TV attempt for now. I still plan on doing the whole HD antenna hook-up at some point – but I’ll probably wait until the roof is no longer frozen solid. In the meantime, Lisa and I can actually watch new shows as they occur if we so desire. Honestly, it’s a very weird experience after 6 months of static. We still can’t tell if FiOS really does provide a much sharper picture than cable or if our eyes have just become so accustomed to the horrendous reception of our $20 Radio Shack antenna that VHS tapes from the 80s would like HD to us.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.