A couple weeks ago I was hanging out with a friend from my old Hoboken bar crowd and mentioned that I had to mow my lawn the next day. She laughed and said that I was probably the only person she knew who had a lawn big enough to mow. And there was probably only one other person who had any grass to begin with.
Of course, bragging about my massive one-eigth acre stretch of land does not actually get the work done. That requires me hauling my push mower (yes, I am becoming a luddite) out to walk around in increasingly shrinking circles that never quite line up right in order to catch all stray blades. I actually do enjoy it on some primitive manly level, but my backwards technological outlook makes it a priority to mow every week. When you skip it for a month, that push mower basically shakes a metaphorical fist at me as it has to work one foot at a time.
Nevertheless, yesterday I managed to unevenly shave the front yard, rip out several pounds of ivy intent on tearing apart our brick steps, and trim the bottom half of an evergreen with some sort of grudge against our driveway. I just hope I’m not going overboard as some sort of payback for my Mom always stopping me from really going to town on the trees and bushes around the house. That’s right, I’m doing things my way, baby. This is my house and my rules, and the glasses get put in the cabinet I want them in, and the ugly trees get removed when I don’t want them, and the walls get painted whatever color I damn well please…
Assuming Lisa says it’s okay.
and the walls get painted whatever color I damn well please
Where could this go wrong?
Incidentally, and on a totally unrelated topic, I noticed you haven’t asked me to help you paint your place… :p
Let me know when you’re doing another day of whatever with the place, I’d love to help out.
The next big thing will probably be kitchen stuff. We talked to a contracter and are going to start looking into a home equity loan to consolidate credit card bills and put money into the house at the same time. We might actually get to renovate the kitchen this year – which means I’ll need some drunk guys to help me take apart the kitchen as it currently stands.
Have you purchased a chain saw yet?
I’ll need some drunk guys to help me take apart the kitchen
Again – Where could this go wrong? 🙂
I’ll need some drunk guys to help me take apart the kitchen as it currently stands.
Woo! I’m still upset I missed out on taking apart Mark’s place o’levels.
I missed out on taking apart Mark’s place o’levels.
You know, even with 3 people working on the place, it got crowded. I guess when you have an Escher-esque floorplan, you can’t have too many drunks swinging hammers all in one place.
I definitely want to have people over again soon, to revel in my place’s newfound glory. And by glory I mean lack of 70’s mirrored porno furniture.